


I Trust You, Completely

by MoonOwl



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Eruri Week 2014, M/M, One Shot Collection, Originally Posted on Tumblr
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-01
Updated: 2015-01-06
Packaged: 2018-03-04 16:05:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 8,151
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3073913
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MoonOwl/pseuds/MoonOwl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>One-Shots for EruRi Week 2014.</p><p>Day 1: Moments in which Erwin learns about Levi’s past.<br/>Day 2: Dating a vampire isn't as glamorous as it is in the movies.<br/>Day 3: Erwin does the household chores for once, much to Levi's surprise (and dismay.)<br/>Day 4: Levi reflects on the little things of his relationship with Erwin.<br/>Day 5: Erwin goes off to a prestigious university, and Levi reads his letters back home.<br/>Day 6: Erwin recovers in the hospital, Levi knits at his beside.<br/>Day 7: Levi and Erwin adjust to civilian life, and not so smoothly.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Past/Memories

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a quick warning for this one-shot: there's a mention/implication of antisemitism.

“You've never really told me much about where you came from.” 

For a short while, Levi glanced in Erwin's direction, before looking out of the office window again. “There isn't much to tell,” he replied, taking another sip of his tea. “You already know I came from the Underground. My story isn't much different from any other gutter child.”

Erwin pushed the document in front of him aside for a moment. “No two persons shares the same story.”

Levi placed his tea cup on Erwin's desk. “Alright, then I was the average criminal who got plucked from the streets by large military-man, and that's were my story diverts from every other poor kid from the Underground's life.”

He decides not to push the matter. Levi will tell him if and when he's ready. 

 

…

 

Nearly everyone was well aware that the Scouting Legion was not universally liked. However, that did not mean that the Scouts didn't have their fair share of admirers. Many citizens of the wall were still proud of their children who went off to fight for humanity's survival, and many others found themselves enamored with the well known figures of the legion. 

Erwin always found himself slightly confused and distressed when a young parent to an infant handed their child over to him. Erwin grew up as an only child, never dealing with younger children. Not many people in the Scouting Legion had children (even less had them purposefully) so even in his adult life, he remained ignorant on matters of child care. He would haphazardly hold the child as best as he could, praying to whatever high power he might believe in that he would not drop the baby. 

Levi, however, held babies like it was second nature. Gently rocking fussy babies, holding ones that seemed scared close. It always amused Erwin to watch him hold a child: someone so seemingly asocial holding something so fragile with great care, all with this unamused expression on his face. 

On a certain day after a certain mission, a young, blushing woman stopped Levi and handed him her baby boy, telling him “I would love to tell him when he's older that he was held by Humanity's Strongest!”

A flash of disapproval crossed Levi's face, but nevertheless he acquiesced and held the child in his arms. Erwin watched on as Levi instinctively cradled the baby in the crook of his arm, supporting his head gently with his other hand. Erwin's lips upturned as watched the scene of Humanity's Strongest solider in a moment of vulnerability, carrying a sweet little infant. 

The woman cooed over Levi and her son. Eventually taking the baby back into her own arms, she thanked the Captain profusely for his time. 

“You always told me you hated children.” Erwin remarked as they set about their way once more. 

“That doesn't mean I don't know how to hold infants.” Levi replied. 

“Did you have a lot of siblings growing up?”

“None I was directly related too,” Levi said. “But very few children in the Underground have adults to take care of them.”

The conversation ended there. The pair remained quiet until they reached headquarters again. Once there, another question found its way into Erwin's mind.

“Do you want children, someday?” He asked. He himself had always imagined, that if the war somehow ended well before his time had come, he would become a father. Even if Levi wasn't too fond of other people's children, he could potentially fancy the idea of having his own. 

“We don't have the luxury of asking ourselves that.” Levi replied flatly. 

…

Erwin loved watching Levi undress.

Truly, there was nothing sexual about it. He loved watching every little movement of his body, whether it was on the field or in the home. From across the room and on the bed, Erwin watched as white cloth gave way to porcelain skin. 

Levi turned his head just enough to see the expression on Erwin's face. “You know, you look like a pervert right now,” he called to him from across the room. 

Erwin simply smiled to himself. “Has anyone ever told you how beautiful you are?”

Levi turned around fully and gave Erwin a wicked grin in return. “I've been told so more than a few times.” 

At that moment, Erwin noticed something glittering. Around Levi's neck is a silver chain holding onto a six-pointed star. Not many soldiers kept things such as jewelry with them, only if it had a special sentimental value. It must have been forbidden, Erwin was sure of it. Vaguely, he remembered its shape on a list indicating items and symbols to be confiscated by the superior officers. In reality, Erwin rarely confiscated anything of the sort from his soldiers. 

“What's that?” Erwin asked, nodding in Levi's direction.

Quickly, Levi's hand shot up to his collarbone, clutching onto the pendent. “It was my mother's.” 

Erwin left the conversation at that. 

...

“Remember how you used to call me 'Sina Brat'?” Erwin asked, just before burying a kiss into Levi's hair. “You really thought I was the son of a noble?”

Night had fallen hours ago, and the pair found themselves in bed. Nothing had happened between the two, as nothing ever did. Erwin had his arm wrapped around Levi, and Levi huddled close to his chest, breathing in his scent though the thin cloth of his nightshirt. 

Levi looked up at the sound of Erwin's comment, noting the knowing smirk on his face. “Well, you certainly looked the part,” he said making, a tch sound in response. “You still do with that haircut. Though, I suppose a teacher's son would have hair like that as well.”

Erwin smiled a softer, more amused sort of smile. “I thought you liked my hair?”

“Doesn't mean I can't make fun of it,” Levi responded as he sat up to run his fingers through a few locks of Erwin's hair. “Did you look like him?” He asked, after a moment.

“Who?”

“Your father.”

Another moment passed.

“You don't have to answer.”

Erwin adjusted his position slightly. “I suppose I did look like him.” 

Levi looked away from Erwin. “Everyone always said I looked just like my mother,” he started. “She was really all I had as a brat. We were poor, and we didn't have much to turn to. The Walls didn't like us. She told me over and over to keep quiet and out of site,” he spoke as fiddled with the pendant on his necklace. “She died when I was young, and then someone came for me. To this day, I still don't really know who he is. He told me to call him Uncle, and he taught me everything I know.” 

He stopped there, perhaps to take a moment to think. 

“I've done things I'm not proud of, but I won't deny that I've done them. I won't deny where I came from either.” Levi said as he let go of of the pendant.

Erwin smoothed a lock of hair out of Levi's face. “You've done so much for a world that's wronged you.” Erwin said as he pulled him in for another affectionate kiss atop his head.

“And there's hundreds more like me...” Levi said, almost in a whisper as he leaned back down against Erwin's chest.


	2. Sacrifices

“You're a vampire? Well of course there's vampires in this fucking town.” 

He had a point, to be honest. 

Trost was quite literally the capital of No Where. It was a college town filled with hippie professors, 20-something stoners and legends as old as the town. With a 4-hour drive to the nearest big city, nothing really came out of Trost except for college grads and stories. If anywhere had vampires, it would be behind a local cafe in the western part of Trost. That is, after all, exactly where Levi Ackerman found himself being told by a tall, handsome and blond man that he was a blood-sucking creature of the night.

“So, you're friends with my manager, and he's cool with you just...taking blood from any of the meat that comes in?” Levi continued.

“Well, yes.”

“Who knew vampires would be so sustainable...” Levi mumbled to himself. 

“Will you tell anyone?” The vampire asked. 

Levi cocked his head at him. “Who the fuck is going to believe me? Some batshit old ladies down the street? Conspiracy theorist college kids?” 

Again, he had a point.

“Anyways, what's your name?” Levi asked. “I might as well know it, seeing as I know you drink blood to survive.

“Erwin. Erwin Smith.” The vampire answered. 

...

“Does this bother you?” Erwin asked just as he was about to take another sip from his drink. 

“It's a little weird.” Levi said, grimacing.

An unlikely friendship formed between the two. Although Erwin would no longer age like a human would, he had only been turned a few months before and was still technically 35. Levi was just 23. Erwin worked as an obstetrician. Levi had been a philosophy major who could only find employment as an assistant manager at the same cafe he worked at in college. Since their initial meeting, Levi had learned that Erwin was painfully lacking in the domestic department and he took it upon himself to occasionally pop over to Erwin's condo and show him how to properly use a vacuum. Not that Erwin minded, as he quite enjoyed it. He couldn't go out and enjoy life the way he used to, since everyday interactions always ran the risk of having his secret found out. Levi made for nice (and cute) company.

“Aren't you supposed to suck blood from something's neck though?” Levi asked sitting across from Erwin at his kitchen table. 

“No, I just need to drink the blood is all,” Erwin explained. “I quite like this method, I'm not wasting any animal products. Actually, I was a vegetarian before I was turned.”

“Of course you were.” Levi interjected.

“What do you mean by that?” Erwin asked. 

“You're Mr. Perfect, that's what I mean,” Levi said. “You delivered babies for a living. You didn't hurt animals while you were human. You look like you probably worked as a Calvin Klein model to help pay off your student loans. Now you're a vampire who not only takes care not to kill people, but you also try to limit your impact on farm animals. It's like you're not even human.”

“Well, technically, I'm not.”

Levi rolled his eyes. “You know what I mean.”

Erwin had finished his drink and set down his glass for good. “How do you know I'm not going to try to turn you?”

Levi didn't respond for a moment. “I trust you.”

“You've just met me.”

“You seem like someone I can trust,” Levi explained with a shrug. “Your story, as sappy and as perfect as it is, does make sense. I can tell pretty well when someone's lying, and I'm sure that applies to vampires as well. Besides, you know my manager, and while he's weird as shit, he's a good guy.” Levi then stood up from his chair, and reached his body across the table to kiss Erwin's lips. “I'll see you tomorrow.” 

...

“Did you always live here?” Levi asked.

The pair enjoyed taking nighttime walks. Erwin had explained that the “sunlight myth” had been just that: a myth. However, he did also explain that many vampires found solace in the nighttime. They could move more freely about in the dark, whether it was to find food or to simply pass the time. As a result, the two often spent their time together after the sun had set.

“No, actually, I came here just a few months ago,” Erwin answered. “I knew that staying in one place too long would be too suspicious, so I thought I'd try living near Mike, since he was the only person I knew I could trust with my...condition, if you will. Besides, Trost is fairly rural and unassuming. It seemed like the perfect fit, and they needed a new obstetrician.” Erwin said. “What made you stay out here?”

“I just went to college here to get away from my parents, mainly,” Levi replied. “I didn't want to go back home, so I thought I might as well just stay out here. It's weird, but it has it's charm. I actually want to open my own cafe out here someday. Not like Mike's though. I want to have a tea shop.” 

Erwin let out a chuckle. “You just don't seem like the small business owner type, especially for a tea shop.” He said with a smile. 

Levi raised an eyebrow.“And what do you mean by that?”

“Tea shop owners seem relaxed and earthy. You, on the other hand, are a professional worrier.” 

“God, I have to be with you,” Levi spoke with a hint of annoyance in his voice. “You can barely take care of yourself.” 

Erwin smiled down at him. “I'm glad I found you to take care of me then.”

...

“Oh my gosh, is this your sugar daddy?”

Erwin had just walked through the door of Levi's apartment when he met his roommate, Hange. 

“Hange, bye.” Levi said as he took Erwin's coat. 

Hange was all smiles at the sight of Erwin. “Oh my gosh, Levi, he even looks rich. You did good with this one!” They giggled as they whispered to Levi. 

“You know what, Hange? I'm just not going to even try with you anymore.” He said, shooing them out of the door. 

Hange gave Levi a friendly slap on the back. “Well, I have the future scientists of tomorrow to teach, so I'll just leave you two to do whatever it is you do in exchange for money.” And with that, the door slammed shut. 

“Just ignore Hange.” Levi explained once they left.

“'Sugar Daddy'? Is that what you've been telling people?” Erwin asked with an amused expression.

“No, they just assumed that's what you are. Besides, how many twink-y looking twenty-sometimes have old men who are actually their 'boyfriends'?” 

“I'm not old.” Erwin responded defensively. 

Levi rolled his eyes as he sat down on the sofa. “You're 35, that's basically the same as being dead to people my age.” 

“Well, I think it's basically the same as being undead.” Erwin started to laugh as he joined Levi on the couch. 

“Oh my God. I fucking hate you. Oh God, you're laughing at your own horrible joke,” Levi said. “You're not like other vampires.”

Erwin gave him an amused smile. “I wasn't aware you knew other vampires?”

“You know what I mean, asshole,” Levi gave Erwin a playful shove. “Like, you're not one of those vampires from books or those cheesy TV shows.”

“How so?”

Levi changed his position on the couch to directly face Erwin. “Well, first off, you have the clothes completely wrong. You're more '1970's suburban dad' than 'hot and sexy, dressed in all black'.” 

“I take offense to that,” Erwin joked. “I think I can make '1970's Dad' look sexy.” 

A grin crossed Levi's face as he rolled his eyes. “You're not daring or adventurous. You're boring.”

“Do I bore you?”

“No, of course not,” Levi said. “You're not boring. You're just, you know, average. Why, did I strike a nerve or something?”

“No, it's just,” Erwin put an arm around Levi's shoulders. “We can't be like normal couples. I want to make sure you're happy and okay with that.” 

Erwin was sweeter and nicer than any boyfriend he had ever had. Levi didn't think he deserved it, after so many disastrous relationships. He didn't think any boyfriend of his would ever care about making him happy.

“Erwin, I'm more than happy with you.”

...

“Are you willing to sacrifice having a normal life for me?” Erwin asked.

It was late. Earlier than day Levi had asked Erwin to live with him. Hange was marrying their boyfriend, a fellow teacher at their school, and as was expected, they were moving in with him. Levi thought this was the perfect time to settle down with Erwin. They had been together for the past year, and he was ready to commit to him, whatever that meant when one was in a relationship with a vampire. 

“I'm not sacrificing anything.” Levi replied. 

“You won't get to open your cafe,” Erwin started. “I won't be able to stay in more than one place for a long time. We'll have to move every five or ten years. We won't be able to get married, to have children. I can't grow old with you.”

Levi crossed his arms.“Alright, fine,” he said as he walked closer to Erwin. “I'll be giving up some things, making 'sacrifices' even, but I'd have to make some for any other guy I could have ended up with. So, I can't open my tea shop. Maybe it would have failed anyways. Besides, it's not like you can work as doctor much more. People will start to realize you're not aging and you can't keep forging papers with different birth dates forever. Look, I don't have a family I get along with, so there's no one I'd miss. I can commit to you, and to whatever life you'll give me.”

“I just don't get it,” Erwin ran a hand through his hair. “I adore you, and I want this as well, but I don't know why I'm worth all of this to you.”

“Because I love you.”

Erwin pressed his lips against Levi's forehead. 

“We can make this work.” Levi said as Erwin kissed him.

...

“You're so beautiful.” Erwin remarked.

“You're lying.” Levi responded, waving his hand dismissively at him. 

There came a point where Erwin simply passed for Levi's home aid, now that Levi walked with a cane and had gone gray. They didn't grow old in the conventional sense. Levi would say that Erwin had been born and old man anyways, and well, the fact of the matter is, Levi wasn't even that old. At just 57 years of age, he found himself in failing health. Arthritis gripped his joints and poor circulation attacked his veins. He found himself short of breath on constant occasion. Erwin had found his body in the same condition it was on the day that he was turned. 

The two had traveled across the country in their many years together. Each place they stayed as just as rural as the next. They found ways to keep on top of finances, from living off of Erwin's saving from his time as a doctor, to Levi selling things he knitted to trendy hipsters and warm-hearted grandmothers. In every new place and in every new year, Erwin found Levi increasingly more beautiful. 

As they sat on their porch in mountainous Vermont, Erwin smiled at Levi. “I mean it, you really are beautiful.” 

Levi smiled back.


	3. Domestic

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Modern and Family AU, featuring Adoptee!Mikasa as their daughter.
> 
> Translation note: "Abba" means "Dad/Papa" in Hebrew!

Levi rarely every slept in, which is why he immediately felt an alarming sense of panic when he saw that the clock on the nightstand read “9:34 AM” on a particularly cold Saturday morning. Quickly, he turned his body to see that Erwin was not in bed beside him. He got out of the bed and exited the room, and gently he walked down the hallway to peak into his daughter's bedroom. Through the door left ajar, his eyes could not see Mikasa anywhere in the room. 

His slipper clad feet padded down the stairs, leading him into the living room. He turned the corner of the room to spy inside of the kitchen. There in the kitchen, he found Erwin, still in his flannel bathrobe and pajamas, turning over the Belgium waffle press, while their 4-year-old waited patiently for her breakfast. Levi watched as Erwin opened the refrigerator to pull out the carton of orange juice before returning to the waffle iron one last time. With his hand, he opened the press to retrieve Mikasa's waffle with the spatula. With a smile, he placed the waffle on a plate in front of his daughter, who then reached for for the maple syrup container. Erwin grabbed the container before she could get it. “It's heavy, Mika, we don't want you making a mess,” he explained as he twisted off the cap and poured the sugary syrup on top of her waffle.

Mikasa began eating her breakfast as soon as her father placed the plate in front of her. 

“How do you like your waffles, Mika?” Erwin asked as he poured her out a glass of orange juice. 

“Not as good as Abba's waffles,” Mikasa said, shaking her little head. “But they're okay, Daddy.”

“Well, I'll just have to practice more.” Erwin remarked with a smile. 

Levi finally stepped into the kitchen after watching the scene between his husband and daughter. 

“Morning, darling,” Erwin greeted at the sight of Levi. “I've got your tea already brewing.” 

“G'mornin', Abba!” Mikasa waved from the table with a mouth full of waffles. 

Levi furrowed his brows and tilted his head to side. “Why didn't you wake me up?” Levi asked. 

“I thought it would be good to let you sleep in,” Erwin remarked as he retrieved the tea kettle from the stove.“You do everything around the house, I should do something for you once in a while.” 

“Erwin, I don't even like sleeping in. It messes me up for the rest of the day,” Levi replied. “Also, I do all of the housework because I left my job when we adopted Mikasa, remember? That's how we decided to do things. Besides I like doing the housework, and you're not exactly the best cook or cleaner.”

“Doesn't mean you don't deserve a break every once in a while,” Erwin said as he poured the hot water into a mug containing a tea bag for Levi's preferred blend. He then handed the mug to his slightly disgruntled husband. “I think I'm alright in the kitchen anyways.” 

“Okay, well don't think this is getting you brownie points with me, because you're not.” Levi said as took the cup from Erwin, a small smile gracing his lips. 

“Now, sit down, relax. I'm making breakfast for you too.”

With that, Levi took a seat next to his daughter at the kitchen table. “So, your dad isn't as good at cooking as I am?” 

Mikasa nodded her head in the affirmative as Levi sneaked a smug grin in the direction of his husband. 

“Abba, Daddy, look!” 

Levi quickly turned his attention back to Mikasa, then to see that she was pointing in the direction of the toaster. Flames and smoke escaped from the toaster's vents. Immediately after, the fire alarm sounded. Levi quickly ushered his daughter out of the kitchen. “I'll get the fire extinguisher!” He called as he left the room. 

He retrieved the extinguisher from the hall closet and entered back into kitchen. Erwin stood by as he put out the flames. 

Levi turned to face Erwin. “What were you doing with the toaster?!” Levi asked. 

“Toasting a croissant.” Erwin replied. 

Levi's mouth fell open in shock. “You put a croissant in the toaster? Who the fuck does that?!” He exclaimed. 

“Abba said a bad word!” Mikasa called from the living room. 

Heaving a sigh, Levi rolled his eyes and rubbed his temples. “Well, no one got hurt,” he mumbled to himself. 

Erwin pressed his lips together and assessed the situation in front of him. “Better luck next time?” He asked. 

Levi raised an eyebrow. “There is not going to be a next time.”


	4. The Little Things

It was hard for Levi to pinpoint the exact moment he fell in love with Erwin. 

Falling in love with Erwin was like a running stream. It flowed and flowed, past bumpy rocks and sharp turns, but eventually it emptied out into a body much larger and much grander, and it was all worth it in the end.

Every past lover Levi had couldn't compare to Erwin. He had men who were wonderful in bed but couldn't care enough to give him the time of day. He had women who sought him out for protection or status among the gangs of the Underground, but they would never wake up next to him once they found someone more important. Erwin was different. Erwin was distant, he was chaste, he was cold, but he was oh, so perfect. He was strong, handsome, smart, and underneath every plan he made and cold stare he gave was an undying selflessness and a love for the human race. Every smile he gave, every touch, every order filled Levi with so much admiration and adoration for him. 

Erwin was the best lover he ever had without exactly being his lover. 

The feeling had been mutual, that had been established for a while now. Levi had never been one to keep his thoughts shut away in his head, and neither had Erwin. However, Erwin had rules, one of which was the fact that he stayed away from romance on a matter of principle. There was too much at stake, which, Levi thought, made him perfect for Erwin. He was in the same exact position of never knowing when his day would come. Yet, Erwin relented, saying it still wasn't right. He didn't want to put Levi through that emotional journey. 

To a certain extent, Levi was content with just that. Even if he couldn't touch Erwin in all of the ways he wanted to, he liked to just look at him, to spend time with him, to be near him. Most of all, he loved knowing the little things about Erwin. His favorite books, his favorite foods, his likes, his dislikes. How he someday wanted to get married and have children, if his fate allows for it. How he loved dogs. The name of his mother. He liked doing little thing for Erwin. Levi found himself in the habit of taking care of the domestic duties for Erwin's office. Occasionally, he would clean it, telling Erwin he couldn't take care of it himself. Sometimes, he would make Erwin breakfast and bring it to him in his office. Many a times, he just liked to keep Erwin company in their days off the battlefield. 

He brought up toasted rye bread and the redcurrant spread to the office. Erwin liked redcurrant jam, Levi remembered him saying before. He made a cup of tea for Erwin and another for himself. When he entered the room, he found Erwin still securing his bolo tie. 

“Oh, Levi, you didn't have to do this for me,” Erwin remarked at the sight of Levi with the tray. Of course, he said that every time Levi brought up breakfast for him.

“Oh, stop pretending you're above enjoying having others do things for you. You're not that selfless,” Levi responded as he set the tray on the table.“I was up anyways. Might as well make myself useful.”

“You need to get more sleep. It's not healthy to lead a life such as yours on such little sleep.” Erwin said, concern lacing his voice. 

“Oh, I'll sleep when I'm dead,” Levi responded with a dismissive wave. “Paperwork, today?”

“Lots of it. You're welcome to join me later. I know how much you like to curl up when the sun is shining directly through my window while you work on your knitting, but you must have your own piles upon piles of paperwork with your promotion.” Erwin said as he sat down at his desk. 

“Not as much as you do,” Levi replied. “But I do have more to do now.”

“You'll get used to it soon enough.” 

“Well, I'll leave you be,” Levi called as he began to exit the room.“Don't overwork yourself. You're not getting any younger.”

“Levi, wait.” 

“Yes, Erwin?” Levi responded, turning back to face Erwin. 

“I wanted to congratulate you, privately,” he began. “You'll do wonderful as captain. Your leadership is exactly what the Scouting Legion needs.”

Erwin extended his hand for what Levi thought would be a congratulatory handshake. In response, Levi extended his own hand to shake Erwin's, when the commander instead took hold of Levi's much smaller hand and brought it to his lips.

Levi raised a curious eyebrow. “I thought this was against your rules.”

“I see nothing wrong with this,” Erwin replied with a knowing smile. “A kiss on the hand is a common courtesy.”

Levi took a moment to think about what had just happened. “Is it really a 'common courtesy' when you're in love with the person whose hand you're kissing,” he remarked as a bitter smile crossed his face. “And he's in love with you?”

Erwin then smiled a sad sort of smile. “It's a common symbol of respect between dignitaries, even between members of the clergy and the church,” he explained. “And sincerely, I do mean it, from a strategic standpoint, your new status as captain is what we need.”

Oftentimes, Levi thought Erwin would be a lawyer in another life, with the way he always found loopholes and could work his way around a subject. “Alright then, thank you. I'm not sure someone who can barely hold a conversation is entirely fit for the job, but if you think I'm fit for it, well, I haven't doubted your judgment in a long time.”

Levi then turned back around to leave the room. He thought to himself that he fell deeper and deeper in love with Erwin everyday, and he knew that he was quite alright with it. A full, romantic relationship would interfere with their mission, which was the most important thing in this dangerous world to Erwin, and Levi was there to follow him to the end of that mission. He knew may never have a romance for the ages with Erwin, and he may never even have a normal relationship with Erwin, but at least he had the satisfaction knowing that he loved Erwin and Erwin loved him back. 

After Levi exited the office, he brought the hand Erwin had kissed up to his lips. “What a man...” he said as he smiled to himself.


	5. Distance

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1920s AU!
> 
> Translation note: "Mameh" and "Tateh" mean "Mom/Mama" and "Dad/Papa" respectively in Yiddish!

Erwin Smith was a boy who was going places, or, that's what Mameh always said.

The Smith family had been the neighbors of the Ackermans since 1918, after Erwin's father had died in the Great War. The two boys seemingly came from different worlds, with Levi being the son of two Jewish immigrants from Austria-Hungary and Erwin being the son of a Protestant widow whose family tree was said to have stretched all the way back to the Mayflower.

Mameh liked Mrs. Smith and considered her a good enough friend to occasionally invite over for tea or coffee, and she had encouraged Levi to befriend the nice lady's 11-year-old son soon after their move.

Erwin had become acquainted with Levi not just his presence in the neighborhood, but by spending hours in Tateh's bookstore. Levi loved to read, and Erwin loved it just as much. Whenever Erwin found himself in the good fortune of having extra pocket money, he went and bought himself a book. He loved to read anything, as he loved to learn about everything. The two boys read together in the afternoons, and their companionship extended beyond just books. They explored the streets together and told each other everything, from secrets, to stories, to dreams. As teenagers, they learned that they liked kissing boys just as much as they did girls together.

Not many from around their neck of the woods finished high school with the boys, simply because it meant nothing for them. They were the children of simply shop keepers and factory workers. School didn't matter to them. Mameh and Tateh told Levi to make the most of what he had, so he demanded his stay in school as long as he could. Erwin believed that if he studied hard enough, he could do anything. The boy had the right combination of smarts and good luck, because after high school, Erwin left to study at Princeton. Levi, meanwhile, stayed behind.

Levi had been a smart boy, but he didn't apply himself the way Erwin did. He didn't have the same spirit of optimism that propelled Erwin to the top of their class, nor did he have a rich uncle who was the alumnus of a prestigious university. He would follow in his father's footsteps, work in the bookstore, and take it over when Tateh got too sick or old.

Since leaving for college, Erwin rarely visited. His uncle thought it would be best for him to spend his summers with him and his wife, seeing as they were the ones paying for his education.

Mrs. Smith would come over to talk to Mameh and tell her and Tateh all about Erwin's studies at college. Levi, however, already knew everything she did and more, for Erwin sent him his own private letters just as frequently.

 _My Dear Levi_ , they would begin. Erwin would always start that way, and while Levi thought the inclusion of “my” was a little on the sappy side, he truly didn't mind being referred to as Erwin's.

_I've friends from all over at school, but none of them compare to you. Many of them are dull, but I suppose they're alright companions. They don't possess your wit or your sarcasm..._

Levi found it hard to believe that simple boy like him could not compare to the likes of Erwin's fellow students, but maybe Erwin just wasn't used to them yet. No one in their neighborhood would fit in all that well at university.

_...Not to mention, none of them have your pretty little nose either._

Every letter contained some little compliment towards Levi.

 _Someday, I want to explore the world with you, go to all of those places we read about in books together. How does that sound?_ Erwin would write. Levi doubted this would happen. He'd probably never leave their city. But, if Erwin wanted to dream, he'd let him. It got him far enough already.

Of course, every letter would end with an _I miss you_.

Levi missed Erwin terribly. He missed late nights spent up reading to one another. He missed Erwin's touch and their shared kisses. He missed the way his face lined up perfectly with Erwin's shoulder and how they fit together in an embrace. Yet, he never lamented over it too much in his own letters to Erwin. He was happy for his friend. This is what Erwin wanted, so Levi supposed it was what he wanted as well. It's not like he could have married him anyways.

Levi knew he would probably spend the rest of his life much like Tateh did. He would probably marry Petra Ral, the girl down the street whose own Tateh was also another Jewish shopkeeper. She was pretty and sweet, and Levi did like her well enough, but her hair didn't smell like Erwin's did and her tiny frame would never feel like Erwin's broad and muscular body.

Erwin would probably go on to marry some nice girl from a well educated Anglo-Saxon family, maybe a daughter of one of his uncle's Princeton friends. Together, they'd produce beautiful little boys who looked just like Erwin and were just as smart and headstrong. Erwin would be a good father, Levi was sure of it.

Levi would promptly write his own letter back. _Dear Erwin_ , he would begin, wondering if he should ask Erwin to try to come visit home when he could.

(He never did.)


	6. Reunion

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Spoilers for chapters 49-51!

When Levi is nervous, he knits.

Knitting is good because knitting is productive, at least that's what Levi thinks. Levi could sit around all he wants but he still feels good because at least he's still doing _something_.

Of course, when Erwin loses an arm, Levi can only think to knit at his bedside. The first moment is he available after hearing the news, he rushes himself to the military hospital. He picks a navy blue wool to knit with. A blanket with a ribbed stitch, he thinks to himself. Winter was approaching so it would be sensible to make a blanket.

He's been prepared to lose Erwin, but the uncertainty of it all kills him. The doctor says he'll recover, but Levi is not so sure, seeing has the man had his armed ripped off in the jaw of a Titan. He knows better than most that soldiers may leave the battlefield missing a limb or two, only to lose their lives a day or so later.

When Hange comes by Erwin's hospital bed, Levi is working on the fifth row of the blanket.

Hange takes a seat next to Levi beside Erwin's beside. “Looking after the commander?”

Levi nods. He's just starting the sixth row now. “What brings you here?”

Hange takes a deep breath before sighing it out. “Waiting for him to wake up...we've got some new developments on the origins of the Titans. I don't want to say anything yet since Erwin's still asleep, and Pixis will be coming soon, but it doesn't look...good.”

Levi nods to himself. Nothing was looking up for the Scouting Legion these days.

“What do you got there?” Hange asks as they take a look at Levi's craft.

“It's a blanket, obviously. Do you need new glasses?” Levi responds not looking up from his work.

“Sorry there,” Hange rolled their eyes at him bemusedly. “Just trying to make some small talk to get our minds off of things.”

Levi doesn't respond, he simply knits.

“Look,” Hange begins in their comforting voice. “The doctor said he'll be fine. The blood loss wasn't as bad as it could have been, now he's just fighting the infection. He's probably seen worse.” Hange finishes by giving him an affectionate squeeze on the shoulder.

There Hange goes, their ever optimistic self. Erwin probably has not seen worse, Levi thinks to himself, because Erwin could have very easily died this time. He can't imagine life without Erwin. He knows that the chance of Erwin leaving him is ever-present, he's long accepted that. Yet, Levi couldn't accept that Erwin could maybe not live long enough to see humanity's freedom, nor did he know if the Scouting Legion could carry on without him. He's done so much for the Legion, he's changed so the entire nature of how they function. It would never be the same without Erwin. They may never defeat the Titans without him.

Levi is on row seven when Hange gets up to leave, saying that they have to meet with their squad.

 _Knit two, purl two_ , Levi repeats to himself. He repeats the phrase almost like mantra as he tries to keep his mind off of the fact that this is the first time he's seen his commander in days and he's lying in a hospital bed. He tries to get his mind off of the fact that he injured his ankle and he couldn't go on that mission with Erwin. He doesn't want to think about how being Humanity's Strongest is of no use to Erwin when he's incapable of fighting.

“Levi?”

Levi looks up from his knitting, which is at its ninth row now, to see that Erwin is awake. Gently, he reaches out a hand to stroke Erwin's remaining one, hoping not to startle him.

“Where am I?” Erwin mumbles.

“You're in the hospital,” Levi responds. “You were...hurt on a mission.” Levi hesitates to tell Erwin the whole truth. He's just woken up from a deep, feverish sleep caused by losing his arm. This needs to go slowly, Levi thinks to himself. Levi hates his part, because he's never been all that great at sentimental things like comforting other people. However, before he can think of anything to do, Erwin's eyes have closed again.

…

When Erwin is fully awake and alert, the blanket is at thirty-four rows. He sits up in the hospital bed watching Levi knit away. “How long have you been making that blanket? I don't remember seeing you with it before.” He asks.

“Since I first came to visit you,” Levi looks up from his work. “Do you want it when I finish?”

Erwin presses his lips together and shakes his head. “Oh, no. It's your hard work, you should keep it.”

“Erwin, I'm just making this to keep busy while I'm visiting you.”

“You don't have to be visiting me all the time,” Erwin explains in a gentle voice. “I'm sure you've got better and more important things to do.”

Levi puts his knitting down. “...You worry me, Erwin. I'm involved in all of this mess because of you.” Levi responds with a bittersweet smile crossing his face. “Anyways, I want to give the blanket to you when I finish it. Technically, you 'inspired' me to knit it.”

“Well, thank you, I'll be sure to appreciate it,” Erwin replies, the corners of his lips upturning. “But, Levi, don't worry over me. I sincerely mean that.”

Levi stands up from his chair and he leans over to press his lips to Erwin's forehead. “Welcome back, Erwin.”


	7. Future

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A Post-Canon Universe fic! Family/Angst/Hurt-Comfort themes.

Levi had never wanted children, that is, until he met Erwin. When Erwin had first mentioned the idea of having children, Levi frowned and dismissed the suggestion. Children were for couples that lived average lives and worked normal, non-dangerous jobs – not for people like them. Yet, Erwin had his way with people, and Levi was no different. Every so often he caught himself daydreaming about having a nice little cottage on the mountainside with Erwin with a little baby to care for. When the war ended, of course one of their first thoughts as a newly married couple was to adopt a baby. 

They moved to a small town that popped up just outside of the Walls. In hopes of starting a family, the pair decided it would be best to stay close to civilization in order to employ a wet nurse for the baby and easily access any aid for any ailments that, Heaven forbid, might come to the baby's way. During the first year with the baby, Erwin made plans to move further out into the countryside like he had always wanted too. He hired a team of builders to construct a house by the mountains fit for a family of at least three. Around the time they baby turned one-year-old, they left the security of town life and finally moved into their new home. 

At that point in his life, Levi couldn't even imagine not having his daughter, and he never wanted to. 

“She's perfect,” Erwin would said, looking up from his nightly reading, as Levi cradled her to sleep. And she was. She was the perfect baby. They had a perfect life. A marriage, a cute little house out in the countryside, and a perfect little girl. Levi finally felt that for once in his life, he should be completely and totally happy. 

Once the baby fell soundly asleep, Levi put her into the crib beside their bed. Erwin had planned out a nursery for her, but Levi wanted her to sleep in their room for a while longer, even though she had long outgrown her original bassinet and slept soundly through the night. 

After making sure the baby was laid comfortably on her back, Levi made his way into his own bed, always on the left side next to Erwin.

“Do you want any more children?” Erwin asked as he put his book down on the nightstand. 

Levi made a face in disapproval. “One is enough for now. Lily's still a baby, you know.”

“Of course, but when she's older, maybe we should give her a younger sibling,” Erwin said with a smile. 

Levi propped himself up on one elbow and looked at him for a moment. “Erwin, can we really take care for another child?”

“Well, I suppose we should move Lily into the nursery first.” Erwin remarked as he finally laid down for sleep.

“It's not about that.” Levi said before turning over onto his side. 

...

Levi had never operated on much sleep, which came in handy with the baby.

Just before dawn the next morning, little gurgles and cries sounded around in the room, signaling to Levi that Lily had finished sleeping for the night. He picked up the baby and carried her to the kitchen where he set her down on the floor with one of her stuffed animals. Moving about the kitchen, Levi began to prepare for breakfast, while still trying to maintain a close eye on Lily.

Erwin awoke soon after and entered the kitchen. Almost immediately, Lily's became alert at the sight of her other father. “Pa...pa! Papa!” And with that, she began moving with her little knees towards him. 

“Be careful, and watch her!” Levi called out to Erwin. “I don't want her to bump into anything.”

“Relax, dear,” Erwin said. “She's fine, just crawling. I've got her if she needs help.” 

When Lily finally reached him, Erwin knelt down to pick her up with his arm and hold her close and snug. 

Levi watched on carefully. “She's still not walking,” he lamented from across the kitchen. 

“She's got time to learn how to walk still,” Erwin said as he walked over to his husband. “She's standing up, isn't she?”

“She is...” Levi mumbled, thinking to check one of those books Hange had sent them. 

“See?” Erwin said as he began gently rocking Lily. “ She's doing fine. I'm sure she'll be walking in no time.”

But what if she doesn't? Levi thought. He rubbed his temples. “A lot can do wrong while she's still a baby,” turning his head, he looked up at Erwin. “How are you always so optimistic all the time about all of this?”

...

Erwin met Levi sitting on the porch with Lily in his arms that afternoon. 

“Let me hold her,” he said, sitting down on the chair next to Levi. “You've been taking care of her all day, you deserve a break.”

Levi gently placed the baby onto Erwin's lap, making sure she was sitting up on his left side. Erwin then curled his arm protectively around her. 

“Levi, what's been bothering you so much lately?”

For a moment, Levi said nothing. “I don't know,” he began, looking out onto the field in front of their house. “I have the perfect life. I married a man who tells me that he's loved me since the day he first saw me, I have a nice house. We're free, we're finally fucking free,” he continues. “So, why am I not happy?” Levi finishes, turning his face to look at Erwin. 

“It's hard,” Erwin began to explain. “Adjusting to civilian life after what we went through. One day you're all alone, wondering if you'll survive, and the next you're married and out of harms way.” 

“I'm just so worried all the time. I thought I'd never have to worry like this again, about subordinates dying left and right, but she's different because she's our daughter, and she's not doing anything dangerous, she's just...fragile. Everyone I've ever had as died on me, and I'm just...so afraid...” Levi's voice trailed off. 

“I haven't died on you yet.” Erwin remarked.

“You've given me enough scares, though,” Levi replied. “Enough to last me a goddamn life time.” Yet, Levi knew he had a point. He hadn't died, after all of those years of worrying over whether or not he would see Erwin the next day. Finally, he had no need to be on constant high alert. It felt, well, wrong to him. 

“Oh, you're so good with her,” Erwin said as he gently rocked Lily on his lap. “She's so lucky to have a father who dotes on her, and who is so wonderful at keeping the house clean and cooking. But you shouldn't be worrying around the clock about her. It's not good for you, so it must not be good for her either.”

Levi turned his attention to his daughter. She had fallen asleep on her father's lap. Reaching over, Levi gently brushed a stray lock of her soft, black bangs out of her sleeping face. Thinking to himself, he wasn't sure if, or when, he would stop worrying. 

“We're doing this together, Levi,” Erwin explained. “I'm here for you, every step of the way. I won't leave you. I'm adjusting to this life too.”

Turning his attention from the baby to his husband, Levi looks up at Erwin with an almost curious look. Erwin was right. He was there for him, and without the threat of the Titans anymore, he would continue to be. 

“It'll take some time, but we've got time now,” he continued. “And I think we should enjoy this life.”

Levi smiled at Erwin. He thought so too.

“About the nursery,” Levi began. “I want to repaint it yellow.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, this is the end. I've decided not to participate in the 8th day, so thank you all so much for reading my one-shots, I really appreciate it!

**Author's Note:**

> Everything was originally posted on [my tumblr](http://commanderhangezoe.tumblr.com/tagged/eruri%20week%202014/)
> 
> Thank you for reading!


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